“Why Smaller Houses can Lead to Happier Lives,” proclaims the title of a recent Washington Post article. I found it chock-full of compelling facts, figures and insights about shared households and well-being.
How Many People?
One key finding was that single person households report higher economic satisfaction, but lower interpersonal satisfaction. In other words, living alone and meeting all of your own needs through goods and services may feel satisfying, but it often comes with a social cost.
When researchers graph the relationship between well-being and number of people in a household, the result is an inverted ‘U’ shape. Living alone or with one other person can promote isolation or loneliness. Excessive crowding, on the other hand, can lead to stress and anxiety. (One study in Asia found that crowding began at less than 140 square feet per person). Happiness peaks at about 4-6 people per household.
Europeans, on average, report higher levels of wellbeing than Americans. Could our homes be part of the reason? The average American home is larger, emphasizing comfort, privacy and status, while the average European home is smaller but more often connected to social and public infrastructure like cafes, shops, parks or and public transportation.
Large Homes
As humans we are prone to hedonic adaptation. Though the move to a bigger house may temporarily boost our mood, we soon return to our baseline level of happiness.
Another reason people in larger homes may report greater dissatisfaction is comparison. As the saying goes, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” If you perceive your neighbors’ homes as larger or more attractive than your own, you’re prone to see your own home as lacking. Clement S. Bellet, a researcher at the University of the Netherlands, calls this phenomenon “The McMansion Effect”
Meanwhile, much of that extra space often goes unused. A 2012 study of 32 families conducted by UCLA researchers found that up to 60% of the space in their homes was rarely occupied. Though large homes often include ‘entertainment’ areas like game rooms, a home theater or formal dining room, those spaces mostly sit empty and serve as storage space. Regardless of home size, families tended to cluster in high-traffic communal areas like the kitchen or living room.
Living With Others
Some of the Washington Post article’s insights came from the University of Oxford’s World Happiness Report, a comprehensive publication of “wellbeing data” collected by researchers and academics in more than 140 countries. (It’s published annually, beginning back in 2012). Chapter 4 of the 2025 World Happiness Report addresses “Living with Others: how household size and family bonds relate to happiness.”
While the study focuses primarily on households made up of related family members, I believe that any group of people who commit to living together can form a caring, convivial home. Even if you aren’t related by blood, you play an important role in one another’s lives. That’s why we at Sharing Housing use the term homemate: someone who is more than a housemate, as you get to know one another, care about one another and build strong ties.
We are bad at predicting what will make us happy
We tend to overestimate tangible things, like money. If I get a better paying job, I will be happy. If I move into a bigger home, I will be happy. This is natural, and rational. More money = more comfort and security. Ergo more happiness.
We tend to overlook those non-tangible quality of life factors like having neighbors that we like, living close to friends or within walking distance of parks.
Perhaps our own personal blind spots are why so much research on the subject of happiness is needed.
Wouldn’t it be great if life, and happiness, were very simple?
It seems to me that ‘The American Dream’ is often marketed as such, a very straightforward equation: lots of money + big house = happiness.
Of course, life is rarely that black-and-white. Every person has a different version of contentment. (Owning a home isn’t even necessarily the key).
The world is complex, and people differ widely in how they want to live and in what they find meaningful.
If you’re here on Sharing Housing, you probably don’t need a bunch of academic surveys to tell you what you already feel: that living with others can improve well-being and quality of life.
Maybe you live alone, in a house that has become a source of stress. The mortgage, repairs, and maintenance costs may feel overwhelming. Stairs may be difficult to manage, while several rooms sit empty and collect dust. Seasonal chores—shoveling snow, raking leaves, mowing the lawn—may no longer be physically manageable. You might be concerned about safety and want another person around. Or maybe you’re simply lonely, and would welcome the company of one—or several—others.
Whether through personal experience or academic research, most of us can agree that social connection is central to life satisfaction. One of the most reliable ways to bring more connection into your life is simple: live with other people. And the data shows that even without a large home, it’s entirely possible to live well together in a smaller space. What matters most isn’t square footage—it’s the quality of connection, communication, and shared agreements within the household.
Here are some other blog posts related to this blog post: Savoring is a Key to Happiness and Is living Alone Making You Lonely?
Leave a Reply