The Unknown is Scary.

I recently overheard someone use the phrase “Better the devil you know, than the devil you don’t” and got curious about its origin. The website phrases.org.uk claims the phrase is Irish in origin, appearing in a 16th century book of proverbs by Richard Taverner. I never trust the internet for complete accuracy, but the consensus on several forums is that the saying, or some variation of it, has existed for centuries.

Human beings have long known and spoken of a universal truth: the unknown is scary! New, unfamiliar things have the ability to paralyze us with fear. Better to stick with what you know.

A new living situation may feel scary.

I have always been a home seeker, never a homeowner. But I can imagine how intimidating the shared housing process must be from the perspective of a homeowner who has never shared before.

After living in your house for years–with family members and/or alone–now comes the time for lots of change all at once. Clearing out extra rooms, rearranging and getting rid of old furniture and artwork. Perhaps even remodeling and making structural changes. Then comes the biggest unknown of all…inviting strangers into your home! It is a process, and an ordeal.

The Great Unknown is just that: unknown.

For whatever reason, humans are wonderful at imagining all sorts of negative outcomes – like messy, inconsiderate housemates. But our imaginations often fail when we try to anticipate a better, brighter future – like housemates who provide good, respectful company, delicious meals, and much-needed help with household tasks like cleaning and yard work.

In the great majority of cases, there is nothing to fear. In fact, the changes you are welcoming into your life will prove to be fulfilling and life-enhancing in ways that you cannot anticipate or envision ahead of time.

The good news, when it comes to shared housing, is that there are plenty of things within your control:

• How you advertise the space.

• What questions you ask potential housemates.

• Who you ultimately invite to move into your home – only thoroughly vetted people who come with good references.

There is another meaning of “the devil you know…”

…and that is “Don’t head into a new situation completely green.” Study it, learn all that you can about it, be informed. Know it, as much as you can, so that it’s no longer a scary “devil” but instead just a challenge that you face with confidence and support.

If you are reading this blog, it means that you have found your way to the support and resources of Sharing Housing Inc. With the online classes, Annamarie’s guidebook, and a community of people who have years of shared living experience, you too can turn unknowns into knowns and alleviate fear.

I myself am facing the Unknown…

…having recently begun a new job! I work in tourism, and spend several months of the year living far from my home in Maryland. Since 2017 I’ve spent the summers working in Alaska, but this year I applied for and accepted a new job, at a resort in Idaho.

The job is very similar to what I did in Alaska: driving a minibus-sized shuttle back and forth from the airport and also working in “hotel services,” assisting guests as they check into and out of the resort.

I applied for this new position because I’m familiar with this part of Idaho, having visited friends who live nearby. I also knew that my years of work experience in Alaska made me well-qualified for the job. It’s a new venture that is also, in many ways, a familiar “devil.”

It is still a new job, however, and it has presented me with plenty of daunting unknowns. As my first day of training approached, I was anxious. I worried that I may have submitted my hiring paperwork incorrectly. I fretted about my new co-workers and what my weekly schedule would be. What about the weather? I’m used to living at sea level, but this summer I’ll be at over 5,000 feet of elevation. No matter how much I tried to rationalize, reminding myself that everything would be fine and that I would enjoy my new position, I still felt anxious.

Presently, I’m a week and a half into the job.

The anxiety has mostly passed, but I still feel uncomfortable. My mind and muscles haven’t mastered all of the new information and tasks associated with my job, and the hours on the clock feel fumbly and awkward.

But! I know that my discomfort will pass. Eventually. In the meantime, I am not alone. All of my co-workers and supervisors are very friendly and helpful. They answer any questions I have. All it takes is time, and repetition, and familiarity with the day-in and day-out of the job, to make me feel confident and comfortable…eventually.

Where in your life are you facing the unknown? Stretching yourself and your capabilities, venturing into new territory, feeling discomfort? Let us know in the comments!

Here’s another post you’ll find interesting: Staying Home by Sharing Housing. And here’s a quick link to our shop where our classes and books are listed.

image by Freepik